Jump into Jumpsuits

The jumpsuit is officially back in (in case you hadn’t noticed already) and judging by the a/w 2010 runways it’s going nowhere fast. So, how – you may very well be asking – do you rock what is essentially an oversized romper suit without, a) looking like you’ve taken style advice from Astro Boy (never a good plan), or b) are a member [real or imaginary] of an elite care-in-the-community Bio-Hazard squad – like this guy…

(Muchas gracias to @millyglaister for this particular gem…pure visual poetry)

French Connection s/s 2010

I must admit, I have been wrestling with the jumpsuit question for a while, that and the obvious inconveniences posed by a full body garment. Need the loo anyone? In the comfort of your own home getting butt naked in the privy would prove no real problem but consider, if you will, the inherent dangers involved once you enter the public domain. What if (Mother of God please protect me from this eventuality) you get caught short on the train, more specifically on a Virgin train: you know, the ones with the slow reveal virtually-impossible-to-lock doors? Forget Freddy Krueger, THIS is what nightmares are made of.

H&M s/s 2010

Missoni s/s 2010

And who could forget our old friend VPL, gloriously enhanced by this season’s penchant for glossy, silky, clingy fabrics. Solution? Commando (I know, rarely does there come a day when going commando is the sensible option, but that’s the jumpsuit for you).

Lanvin a/w 2010

So why? Why subject ourselves to the very real possibility of public humiliation, exposure and (if you’re going down the PVC route) chaffing. Well, aside from the fact that they are f%*@ing cooler than a menthol polar bear floating in the upper troposphere where sky meets space and staring mournfully into a strip-your-face-off sou’westerly…(for sub-zero referencing look no further than the head honcho of retro jumpsuit chic Vince Noir, or Bowie: King of The One-Piece (& the codpiece. Natch! )

At this juncture I would like to invite you to join me in a hushed and reverential kowtow…

Oh, what would I not give for a glam-tastic Ziggy Stardust Jumpsuit!

End of digression.

Sonia Rykiel Resort 2010

Flattering on just about every figure, sexy, in a kinky Kim Basinger kind of way, super hot with a pair of heels, comfortable and office-friendly – that’s some serious day-to-night potential right there (hallelujah!)

Matthew Williamson Resort 2010

Etro s/s 2010

Left: DKNY s/s 2010,  Right: Jean Paul Gaultier s/s 2010

In the end, the out-and-out godlike genius of the jumpsuit far outweighs the mundane faffy little impracticalities. After all, if it were easy –  if it were practical – it just wouldn’t be fashion now would it…

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