Words cannot express (well, that’s not strictly true. Words can – and will have to – express) my deepest and most profound apologies for the lack of Fashionable Rat fashionising over the past week…
Alas! It has been as if my hands had been unceremoniously removed with a blunt spoon and fed to the mythical hand-eating beast of Tibetan legend thereby rendering me brutally maimed (and suffering a terrible bout of authorial impotence).
Okay, perhaps I am erring on the extreme side of hyperbole here, but the truth is only marginally less atrocious. I have been (and I am almost ashamed to admit this) an internet exile. The blogger’s equivalent of Bubonic plague.
Social. Freaking. Suicide.
‘Oh! For the mundane minutiae of status updates! For the sweet simplicity of an RSS Feed leaking updates of ambrosial sweetness directly into my undernourished brain! For unsolicited poking and the bitter sting of woefully substandard blog stats!’
[Said my brain as I lay wallowing in the feverish nightmare of a disconnected and technologically defunct world].
But I digress.
The time for wallowing has passed. After much foot stamping, harrumphing and incessant moaning on my part, my Landlord has finally performed his landlordly duty and we are all systems go on the chuff-a-chuff to wireless heaven.
And so boys and girls, it looks like this particular show will go on…so I’d..er..best get going…x