Faux…but Foxy: Fur Fall/Winter 2010

Winter. It’s here. A fact which struck me as I was stumbling home on the obligatory walk of shame at 8am on Saturday morning (and you KNOW it’s a walk of shame when the local homeless guy who probably hasn’t washed, eaten or enjoyed what one might consider ‘home comforts’ since flares, bell bottoms and Gary Glitter were deemed socially acceptable, inquires after your state of health and well-being).

How, I hear you ask, did this revelation manifest itself (and no, it wasn’t the tramp – he was just an interesting aside). Well. It was the moment I decided that I would quite happily sell my soul – and probably everyone else’s –  for a pair of Chanel F/W 2010 fur trousers…

When legs like Bungle become a viable – DESIRABLE – option you have got to conclude that either a) googlemaps has mistakenly led you to the arctic tundra or b) the season to be jolly has, for the umpteenth time, managed to catch you totally unawares and very unprepared (Soooo… you thought you’d get away without your thermals did you?!…FOOL!!)

With this in mind – and the fact that my wardrobe has, in conjunction with its local Trade Union representative, imposed a ‘No, not ever, not ever ever. Just NO‘ policy in relation to Long Johns – I decided to go and find some warm things I would actually wear. Conclusion? Faux Fur…everything. (Please).

Burberry Prorsum F/W 2010

Let’s start with fur coats which tended to fall into three broad categories for Fall 2010: either, massive, cosy and teddy-bear-esque a la Paul and Joe, slimmed down and chic gilets – see DKNY’s long length chocolate number for this season’s archetype – or edgy and elegant anachronistic beauties (take inspiration from Burberry, Christian Dior and Dolce & Gabbana).

Gucci F/W 2010

The only issue I could foresee in owning any of these (they all have that magical  ‘go with anything’ factor you’d expect from a coat) would be the fact that I’d be too busy hugging myself to actually breathe. A minor inconvenience I think you’ll agree.

Gucci F/W 2010

Fendi F/W 2010

Christian Dior F/W 2010

Dolce & Gabbana F/W 2010

THIS I WANT with every fibre of my being…

Of course I’d  have to top it off with a  Cossack hat (still lounging in fifties redux heaven here, plus it fits nicely with the whole global-traveller-meets-alpine-ski-lodge winter utility “vibe” which has been doing the rounds) Oh! and a pair of tan leather and fur trim ankle boots (which may or may not exist)…and some Miu Miu cable knit tights.

Santa…you had better be writing this down…

Fashionable Rat

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Flying High: Burberry Prorsum & THAT Aviator Jacket

Ah, the Burberry Aviator. I have been avoiding this topic ever since it seared its mannishly sexy shearling and leather and buckle bedecked awesomeness onto my beleaguered eyeballs way back in January.

Why?! I hear you not so much gasp as mutter in a slightly tuttish and reproachful kind of way. (After all, is it not my job, my stated purpose, my purported raison d’être to provide up-to-the-minute commentary on the latest and greatest, the statement and the key, the must-haves and the – seriously? WTF. Don’t-make-me-come-down-there – must-nots of fashion, so help me God?!)

Well. Before you hot-foot it to the fashion blog next door, hear me out. A lack of foresight was most definitely not behind this seemingly insane omission – who in their right mind, or even their totally and utterly wrong mind, could have doubted the trend powerhouse that the Burberry Aviator would become?! (Even my Dad clocked this one and he styles himself in heady mix of late 70’s golfing jumpers, biker leathers and retro punk tees; a kind of Curtis Strange does swapsies in a darkened room with Johnny Rotten). No. My reasoning was simple…

a) The world, his aunt and his anally retentive parrot Phyllis were all on the Aviator bandwagon: homages to the flying jacket were loop-the-looping their way across the blogosphere, twitosphere and general internet-o-sphere like a swarm of starved locusts ready to homogenise the people of the globe into one giant Aviator-wearing fashion-army squadron.
Why add my barely audible squeak to the cacophony of the fashionable – and not quite so fashionable – set?…It is after all possible to be too trendy and I’m not really a massive fan of Goliath-sized bandwagons (in case you hadn’t noticed).

But it was b) that really got me. The lust factor. Of course I didn’t want to write about it…the level of torture is practically mind-blowing…like forcing a nil-by-mouth patient – or someone similarly hungry – to write the next M&S commercial surrounded by glossy pictures of exotically pre-modified potatoes and mouth-watering meats post-modified to Elysian heights. In a word: harsh.

The fact of the matter is I am totally, utterly, unequivocally, obsessively and (ever so slightly) psychotically in love with this coat. I don’t just love this coat, I f*%#ing love this coat. I would probably sell my own grandmother for one, I’d live off nothing but Tesco value bran flakes for eternity x pi + 1 just to have one in my possession, never mind to wear. I mean, Look. At. It. It’s a stylists wet dream, an item which, quite literally, goes with ANYTHING: even a fluro tri-colour shell-suit circa ‘82 would have a certain charm when paired with this baby…(Think about it…scary huh!?!?)

What more can I say? Christopher Bailey: my hat is off. May I please board the bandwagon?

Images courtesy of Style.com & Homotography.

Fashionable Rat

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